The best thing about being single is the liberating notion that I can "let myself go." I don't have to impress anyone. I don't have to be someone that I am not. I don't have to look around the room and wonder if I am the prettiest woman there. I don't care. When I am single, I don't care. It's my fault ( for the most part) that I am this way. I put pressure on myself. If his eyes stray, then I have failed. When I am in a relationship, I feel like I am constantly running a race that has no finish line. My legs are tired.
It's a cliche ( I know) but I am going to go ahead and blame this aspect of my life on my father. When you don't feel good enough for your own dad, how on earth are you going to feel good enough for another man?
Your ex-father is dead.
When it comes right down to it, you are the only person you have. The trick is to become familiar and comfortable with yourself so that you can reach out to others without relying on them.
ReplyDeleteUPDATE: All this time I thought you were too good for me when it is so obvious now that I was and am far too good for you.
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